Yang Terlewatkan

Ada sedikit rasa kecewa kemarin. Disaat 'sweet 15' yg cukup populer. Yang tak biasanya aku diperlakukan seperti kemarin. Pemberian kado, ucapan selamat dari teman-teman tercinta dan satu lagi. Nyanyian Fifteen by Taylor Swift untukku dari sahabat-sahabat tercintaku.

Fifteen Lyrics-Taylor Swift
You take a deep breath and you walk through the doors
It's the morning of your very first day
And you say hi to your friends you ain't seen in a while
Try and stay out of everybody's way

It's your freshman year and you're gonna be here
For the next four years in this town
Hoping one of those senior boys will wink at you and say
"You know, I haven't seen you around before"

'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you
You're gonna believe them
And when you're fifteen feeling like there's nothing to figure out
Well, count to ten, take it in
This is life before you know who you're gonna be
Fifteen

You sit in class next to a redhead named Abigail
And soon enough you're best friends
Laughing at the other girls who think they're so cool
We'll be outta here as soon as we can

And then you're on your very first date and he's got a car
And you're feeling like flying
And you're momma's waiting up and you're thinking he's the one
And you're dancing 'round your room when the night ends
When the night ends

'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you
You're gonna believe them
When you're fifteen and your first kiss
Makes your head spin 'round
But in your life you'll do things greater than
Dating the boy on the football team
But I didn't know it at fifteen

When all you wanted was to be wanted
Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now

Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday
But I realized some bigger dreams of mine
And Abigail gave everything she had to a boy
Who changed his mind and we both cried

'Cause when you're fifteen and somebody tells you they love you
You're gonna believe them
And when you're fifteen, don't forget to look before you fall
I've found time can heal most anything
And you just might find who you're supposed to be
I didn't know who I was supposed to be at fifteen

Your very first day
Take a deep breath girl
Take a deep breath as you walk through the doors


Ditambah informasi jurusan yang hari itu diumumkan. Dan alhamdulillah, aku mendapatkan jurusan yang sesuai dengan apa yang kumau dengan nilai yang cukup. Orang tuaku juga tak memberikan komentar banyak. Itu cukup bahagia, sih.


Cuma ada sekelebat perasaan kurang puas dan sesuatu yang tertinggal. Untuk melupakan hal itu, aku sengaja memutar playlist dihape. Setelah cukup lama mendengarkan, ada satu lagu yg sedikit ku hayati.


Yang Terlewatkan

dimana kau selama ini
bidadari yang ku nanti
kenapa baru sekarang
kita dipertemukan

sesal kan tiada arti
karna semua tlah terjadi
kini kau tlah menjalani, du du du du du
sisa hidup dengannya


mungkin salahku melewatkanmu
tak mencarimu sepenuh hati
maafkan aku
kesalahanku melewatkanmu
hingga kau kini dengan yang lain
maafkan aku


tak berulang kembali
kau tak akan terlewati
segenap hati ku cari, du du du du du
dimana kau berada

mungkin salahku melewatkanmu
tak mencarimu sepenuh hati
maafkan aku

kesalahanku melewatkanmu
hingga kau kini dengan yang lain
maafkan aku

walau ku terlambat
kau tetap yang terhebat
melihatmu, mendengarmu
kau lah yang terhebat

Ya, aku ingat. Sesuatu yang tertinggal adalah dia. Aku terlewatkan. Dia tak memberiku ucapan. Padahal, hari itu hanya satu inginku. Dia. Hanya angan, keinginan, impian, yang kumiliki takkan tercapai. itu semua akan pupus dan kandas. Itu yang selalu terjadi dan terjadi setiap tahunnya bahkan setiap hari atau setiap detik. Keinginanku takkan terwujud.

Terkadang malah aku tak menginginkan impian datang dalam pikiranku. Karena nantinya akan menyakitkan. Lupakan dia. Lupakan tentang keinginan. Lupakan tentang impian. 

Malam itu aku cukup kesal, tapi apa gunanya. Kesal, amarah kesedihan tak mewujudkan segala impianku. Dan akhirnya tertidur dengan novel ghostgirl yg menemani....

......Akhir dari 'Sweet 15' .......